Two in a Bar

Now musicians: take 2 in a bar, 3 in a bar, 4 in a bar, 5 in a bar, they all manage to leg it back to the concert hall in time for their entry. Except the French horn player. The conductor glares at the composer and says "I see he's taken you literally". 'What do you mean?' "The French horn part says 'Play as if from a distance!'" That is based on a true story. Conductor Simon Whiteside said those words to me during a tense studio recording session; I had written that very instruction on the French horn part of a score I composed for a BBC documentary by Dutch director Niek Koppen, 'The Hunt'. I won't suggest he was imbibing ale in a public house but he didn't show up! As a film composer

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